This article was originally posted in November 2015 on TheBLT, where I'm a guest columnist.
Last fall, shortly after Maya's first birthday, I wrote an article about the ways she is similar to me but still very much her own person.
"She's like Stitch," my sister says, referring to the rambunctious cartoon alien who causes much chaos with little effort. (Stitch has four arms but Maya only needs two.) She is quite the whirlwind and always has been. She was the most active baby ever in utero, and I remember the days when she was still very new and would kick her legs all around as if it were impossible for her to stop moving. I would spend so much time just looking at her, staring at her face, memorizing it. It's a good thing, too, because getting a good look these days is hard with all the moving, talking, screaming, laughing, and running."
We initially thought she was leaning more like Justin in personality. While she is very much like him, she's not a perfect fit for either of us. Obviously, since she isn't either of us - she's both. A mixture of us and the ones before us, she is not a copy of anyone else.
Maybe I'll end up with a daughter who's just like me, but better. Better, obviously, because isn't that what kids are for? We make brand new versions of ourselves, a Reghan 2.0, so we can hopefully be saved in their perfection. We give up our whole selves so they can be the best they can be.
I'm bringing up this post again because it is still so true. Sometimes, the similarities between Maya and me or Justin (or a grandparent) are uncanny. But, with every day that passes, it gets harder and harder to see others in her because she is so much like... well, herself. Every parent wants their kids to be better than we are; not to share our struggles, but to give them tools to help others struggle less.
Read the article in its entirety here.
Last fall, shortly after Maya's first birthday, I wrote an article about the ways she is similar to me but still very much her own person.
"She's like Stitch," my sister says, referring to the rambunctious cartoon alien who causes much chaos with little effort. (Stitch has four arms but Maya only needs two.) She is quite the whirlwind and always has been. She was the most active baby ever in utero, and I remember the days when she was still very new and would kick her legs all around as if it were impossible for her to stop moving. I would spend so much time just looking at her, staring at her face, memorizing it. It's a good thing, too, because getting a good look these days is hard with all the moving, talking, screaming, laughing, and running."
We initially thought she was leaning more like Justin in personality. While she is very much like him, she's not a perfect fit for either of us. Obviously, since she isn't either of us - she's both. A mixture of us and the ones before us, she is not a copy of anyone else.
Maybe I'll end up with a daughter who's just like me, but better. Better, obviously, because isn't that what kids are for? We make brand new versions of ourselves, a Reghan 2.0, so we can hopefully be saved in their perfection. We give up our whole selves so they can be the best they can be.
I'm bringing up this post again because it is still so true. Sometimes, the similarities between Maya and me or Justin (or a grandparent) are uncanny. But, with every day that passes, it gets harder and harder to see others in her because she is so much like... well, herself. Every parent wants their kids to be better than we are; not to share our struggles, but to give them tools to help others struggle less.
Read the article in its entirety here.
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