Month in Moments: June

A few shots from my Snapchat story when I did my glucose test.

 And I did pass, with flying colors!

Anniversary date night!

30 Weeks i.e. I Waddle Now

The weeks have become months, at this point. I have come to terms with the fact that I'm a wee bit complain-y. Isn't it my right or something?

Anyway, I truly feel like this kid could bust out of my stomach with each stretch. My abs aren't as tough as they were before I had Maya, so my stomach muscles are pretty much useless at this point. Maya is more active than ever, and I am exhausted. My vehicle is having problems, my washer broke, it's a thousand degrees outside, and any position that doesn't free up my lungs is suffocating.

BUT! I am so excited about things coming up. And, let me tell you, there is no shortage of things coming up. The holiday weekend, a baby shower, Maya's second birthday (which is particularly enticing because there's gonna be a lazy river involved), and the birth of this new little baby. Now that I've publicly complained, I'm free to exclaim - in text - how exciting so much of this is. I don't need to even open my tired eyes to say "WOOHOO" online, so WOOHOO!

At my last prenatal appointment two weeks ago, my uterus measured a week and a half bigger than where I am, which isn't anything to be afraid of yet. At my next appointment on Thursday, I'll be measured again, and we'll see how things look. I'm just gonna chill and let this baby do his thing, and whenever he's born, he's born. And if he busts right out of my stomach to make his arrival, I'll just look at it as a free tummy tuck or something.

He's so strong. I'm proud and all, but I'll be more proud when I'm not in pain. That's not me complaining, that's just a simple fact.

This is also a fact: Any more children I give birth to will not be born in summer. They just won't.

Pet Fever

Currently, we have no pets, including the mouse we recently encouraged to be with Jesus. I'll be the first to admit that this is the easier, cleaner, cheaper alternative to letting animals live with you. I also have a child (and a half), and I don't think letting children live with you is a responsible choice, either. However, we're humans and we want love and companionship, so we do what we want, even if it's inconvenient and expensive and messy.
Me, to Justin: "I want a pet. A kitten maybe?"
J: "Is a toddler and a newborn not enough?"
Me: "We haven't had the newborn yet and I still have the fever!"
J: *lovingly rolls eyes*

Our plan does not include pets right now. However, if I show up at home with a pet one day, I cannot be held responsible. It probably needs my love to live. That's not my fault, obviously.

I only suggested a kitten because they're so darn cute. Also, even though I am not a cat person, they're so much more independent than dogs and way easier to take care of. Plus, Maya needs to learn responsibility or something, right? Yeah. That sounds good. Maya needs to learn the joys of caring for someone else. Who am I to deny my child a valuable learning opportunity?

I think Justin wants a pet more than I do. But he can be trusted. I can't, and that's just a fact.

I probably won't get a pet right now. Who knew an exhausted pregnant chick with a toddler would want a hairy living thing to take care of? On that note, why does anyone have pets? Or kids, for that matter?

The point is that you can't judge me for being human. I think that's the point. I don't know. I'm off to the pet store to cuddle some puppies. Or I shouldn't? Nah, it'll be fine. It'll be fine.

28 Weeks

Nightly leg cramps, daily heartburn, constant lower back pain, swollen feet, puffy cheeks that just won't quit... Daaa dada daaaaa!!! Third trimester, baby!

I was never worried about how long my second pregnancy would seem to be. I had an inkling that it would be over before I knew it, and I've been right so far. Part of me can't believe we're in the last trimester already. My long torso allows me to carry babies deeper (apparently) and because of this, I look about two months behind where I actually am. With Maya, I was a week overdue and a stranger, whose daughter was due a month after me, guessed that I was due a month after her.

I was all, "No, no, man I don't know. I am, in fact, seven days past my due date." We had a good laugh at his ...compliment?... but I was already having contractions by then or else I might have cried a little.

This time, I'm a lot more prepared. For starters, there's a lot less anxiety because I know what to expect. More importantly, I'm prepared to be pregnant longer than they say I'll be pregnant. Can't fool me twice, body!

The joke will still be on me if this kid is born early.

I digress. I meant to say that I guess I was expecting to be in the second trimester forever until my bump was too huge for life. I don't know why. (I'm getting really close to that, anyway.) Like I said, this pregnancy has flown by. I haven't had time to overthink hardly anything. Tragic! Really though, days were like weeks with Maya. Silly childless Reghan, how cute. How cute that you were SO BUSY you were able to just obsess about being pregnant 24/7. Seriously, what did I do with my life before this? Wasted it, I tell you! Pure waste.

I'm excited for this little man to be born. I love pregnancy, but it's like a huge pause. I have more to do than ever before, yet I still have so much I want to do that can't be done until I'm no longer a host. He'll be out of me before I know it, and then months will go by and I'll wake up one day and realize I've been a zombie the whole time. I won't know what day it is, or what month it is, and then I'll get to file a tax return with two kids on it and, at that point, I'll probably wake up a little.

I'm already tired. Just let me sleep, okay?

Don't, really. I have things to do and I think I'm running out of time. I think, I THINK, I'm in the last trimester now?

Coffee, Forever Unfinished

It doesn't matter when I drink coffee. It doesn't matter where the coffee came from. It certainly doesn't matter how badly I need the caffeine. One fact remains:

My coffee is never finished.

The mug is never empty. There's always some at the bottom, cold. I'm actually starting to believe it's brewed that way. The first little bit must go in cold, and the rest goes in hot.

Do people actually drink the last bit of coffee? Is that a real thing? I have never seen someone take that last gulp of coffee, and I've certainly never seen someone do it with an expression that says, "Ah, satisfaction." I can't even imagine their life. Either they're so free and alone that they can finish a cup of coffee in one sitting before it gets cold, or they're so desperate for caffeine that they down the whole thing in an attempt to function. I don't envy either.

Some days, I pass by my cold mug of unfinished coffee and wonder how much money was wasted. Some days, I sigh Napoleon Dynamite-style and wonder why I even bothered. And every now and then, as I pour the rest of my now-cold coffee in the sink, I think about the glorious day when I can finish my coffee while it's hot. Or just finish it, period.

BUT THEN! Then, I realize I don't really want that day to come. What would that mean if it did? The first and most obvious answer is that I wouldn't have young kids living with me. The day will come, sure, but why would I be sitting in one place long enough to drink coffee like that? Do people just sit for long periods of time besides the movies these days? If they do, did I suddenly become a different person that can do whatever she wants and still chooses to sit and drink coffee for some reason?

There's nothing wrong with that, unless you're me. If you're me, you'll always be frustrated with the unfinished coffee, but always fearful of the day that it isn't unfinished. If you're me, you can admit that motherhood isn't the end-all for your life, but still admit that you'll probably be a terrible empty-nester someday, at least for a while. If you're me, you'll remember that everything is a phase, which will make you want to cry for joy and cry for heartbreak, all in the same day.

You know what? I like sweet tea better anyway. It's already cold, and not once in my life has sweet tea made me think existentially. Not one single time.

3 Months Left

As of today, we have exactly three months until this baby is due. The most important thing to remember here is that I didn't panic.

I repeat: DID NOT panic. Today. I didn't panic today.

The secret here is that I already panicked. As soon as May became June, I low-key freaked out and did a TON of planning. So much planning. Having kids challenges everyone. You know why? Because you have to be equally structured and unstructured. Then you have to know when to be which. Who can live under these conditions?!

Do you see how I'm totally calm and collected and not freaking out at all?

It's not that I'm anxious about his arrival. In fact, thinking of when he is finally born is the best relief I have right now. The last and craziest trimester will be gone, and I'll have a bunch of check marks on all my lists. For a naturally flexible personality like mine, it is no small task to get things done. I generally get things done, but with a lot of planning and preparation on my part. I know me better than ever, and I can't just willy-nilly spring through life all the time, particularly as an adult, especially as a parent. In fact, it's probably lucky that my first kid is strong-willed, 'cause otherwise, I have no clue what we'd be doing. Just laying around?

Many feelings (that I'm told are normal) are starting to emerge, like what if I screw this baby up because I try to parent him like I learned to parent Maya? What if she feels abandoned by me when there's a new baby at home? What if he isn't as advanced in development as she is and I spend his whole childhood comparing him to her? He can't live in a shadow! But see, these are things I don't worry about anymore because I am perfectly chill and zen.

I can't deny my excitement. Knowing that we're so close to bringing home a baby boy is uplifting. It makes sense for us. Nothing motivates me quite like being a mom, especially since it's not such an unfamiliar experience this time around. There's nothing quite like the first time, but maybe there's nothing quite like the second time, either. That's been true so far, at least.

Tomorrow, I'm 27 weeks pregnant. Tomorrow is 3 weeks until the 30s, 13 weeks until the due date, and negative 6 days until I freaked out a little.

See? 100% casual, laid back, mellow. Lax, even. If I were any more chill, I'd be frozen Anna before her act of true love thaws her out. Or I'd be Hans' heart. Or Olaf, maybe. Arendelle after Elsa freezes it? Or Elsa herself! She's gotta be cold.

Anyway, the point is that I'm fine.

6 Years

Our Wedding - June 5, 2010

Six years ago today, I married my best friend. He's more of my best friend today than he was then. We haven't been without hardships, but EASILY the most important thing we ever learned is that whatever happens is happening to BOTH of us. We are Team Straily and we both bring something unique and important to our relationship. We challenge each other. (Well, to be fair, I challenge him and he sets a great example for me. I like to think I'm worth the trouble, but I didn't ask him, although I'm sure he'd say I am.)

On our 6th anniversary, here are ten questions we answered together.

1. What have you learned to appreciate about each other that you didn’t know when you first married?
Justin: I didn't know how good of a writer you are. I always pictured you as a painter.
Reghan: Your extreme discipline and ambition. You make me plan for things I wouldn't have dreamed of, and accomplish things I never would've tried.

My Senior Prom - Spring 2009

2. What dreams or expectations did you have about married life? Which have been fulfilled and which have not?
J: We had kids young.
R: I agree on that, we always wanted to have kids young.
J: We wanted to have a house by now. We haven't quite made it to the ownership bracket.
R. *laughs* So true.
J: We're not rich yet.
R: Not yet!

Our Honeymoon Cruise - September 2010

3. What have you given up for each other? How do you feel about it?
J: Even though you've never been career-driven, you gave up working outside the home... for these things.
Maya: *screams*
J: I don't know why.
R: You gave up a LOT of peace and quiet, and that doesn't even include kids.
J: Yeeeeeah.
R: ...How do you feel about that? *nervous laughter*
J: *laughs* It has been worth it so far.

Cruise - October 2013

4. At what times have you felt happiest together?
R: When we get to spend a lot of quality time with each other. We're happiest when we get one-on-one time together.
J: When we go on vacations or cheap dates like when we were dating. In those times, it's usually just us. So, basically, your answer.

After Ziplining in Roatan, Honduras - October 2013

5. How do you manage when desire levels differ?
J: We usually compromise.
R: I think we're pretty good at that, actually. When you want something or want to do something I don't want to do, I just remember all the things you do with and for me that you'd rather not do.
J: I do the same thing. Like going to Cracker Barrel for every meal.
R: What? I don't want Cracker Barrel for every meal!
J: And I don't want Mexican for every meal.
R: Well... Yeah, you kinda do.

Valentine's Day Date - February 2016

6. How much money do you have now? How much did you think you would have at this point?
J: None. More.
R: *hysterical laughter* Fake laugh. Hiding real pain.

5 Year Anniversary - June 2015

7. Are you in agreement about having children, raising them, educating them?
J: Yeah!
R: I should hope that we're in agreement, since we're having them.

Our Wedding Day - June 5, 2010

8. How have you learned to cope with the normal, day-to-day irritations of married life? How could you handle them even better?
J: More naps for the kids.
R: What does that even mean? She naps while you're at work!
J: *laughs*
R: So how have we learned to cope?
J: Chocolate and sweet tea.

April 9, 2016

9. Do you feel more emotionally connected than you did early in your relationship?
J: Yes.
R: Absolutely.

10. How would you define love now? How does it compare with what you thought love was when you married?
R: I would say it's a lot more complex now, but also a lot simpler. Do you know what I mean?
J: ...No.
R: There are so many different ways to show love, ways I never knew existed back then. Or how deep it could be. But that doesn't necessarily mean that love is rocket science, you know? It's easier to show love in general, at this point in life.

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And to think, we still have a whole year until the seven-year itch kicks in.

April 30, 2016